Adult Virginity

There are more adult virgins than most people think. Adult virgins do not fit any particular stereotype such as a shy, unattractive mumbler who cannot approach women. Not so. Virgins look just like sexually active people you know. Not all virgins have a "geeky" personality, nor are they necessarily physically unappealing. Some may be incredibly successful professionally and confident in their work lives. They may be wealthy, healthy, active and have lots of friends.

Some virgins may suffer from a social disorder and thus have not developed proper dating skills. A lack of confidence, a sexual dysfunction, and deep rooted psychological issues could also explain what holds them back from pursuing relationships.

However, in romantic circumstances they typically lack confidence. The only thing you can say about "all" virgins is that they haven't had sex. Most want to have sex because it is a natural human desire. Most would love to lose their virginity but don't know how to start.

More Male Virgins than Female

The dating world is not exactly easy to break into for a man with budding social skills, and one who by traditional standards, should already be graduating the dating scene. Statistically speaking virginal men outnumber virginal women in sex therapy. This is interesting because it is generally believed that men have more insistent desires and are inclined to sexually pursue a woman even if he is shy. In addition, men have the reputation of being the aggressor in relationships while the woman is the reactor.

With so many enthusiastic "alpha males" to choose from, women always have the chance to lose their virginity. A virginal man on the other hand, might be failing in his efforts to find a partner. Men who lack sexual or romantic education will have no clue what they are doing wrong and so may become discouraged and start to withdraw socially.

The Remedy for Virginity

Sex therapy is beneficial to men who are seeking permanent solutions to their dating problems. Therapists can teach men the social skills and dating techniques that will be required in the real dating world. With this education they can take steps to form relationships with people they meet socially. Sex therapists can also teach virgins the important points of sexual education; men and women's bodies, orgasmic response and how to please a partner. Finally, they can help patients to alleviate their fears and inhibitions about sex and learn to enjoy the passionate moment like everyone else.

Telling an adult virgin to just get out there and start dating is like telling some to just stop taking drugs. It pretty ineffective advice. You need a specific skill-building, educational program. Make a serious, committed decision to improve your sex life.

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tova@sextherapylosangeles.com