Performance Anxiety

Men have a great desire to please their partner and make each sexual experience a memorable encounter. It is normal to bring a healthy erotic anticipation to sexuality. However, some men worry about their sexual skills, their ability to achieve an erection, concern about their ejaculatory control or their ability to bring a woman to orgasm. This is called performance anxiety.

Performance anxiety is an excessive fear about engaging in sexual activity that can block sexual feelings and functioning. Men with this problem start to fear sexual intercourse, and put so much pressure on themselves to perform that they scare themselves right out of the game. It may cause some to avoid sex. Anxiety starts to take the place of sexual passion.

How Was I?

How does performance anxiety start? It usually starts with a disappointing sexual encounter which triggers chronic worry. Also, if your lover is demanding absolute perfection every time, then it's a doomed affair to begin with.span style='mso-spacerun:yes'> Sex should be enjoyable, something fun that both partners can joyfully experience together.

Some media avenues paint unrealistic expectations of sex. Not surprisingly, individuals who are avid pornography readers (or perhaps romance novel readers) soon discover that real sex just isn't that flawless in real life. Entertainment is purposely exaggerated, and no lover living in the real world expects their partner to transport them to another world with just an act of sex. Sex should be enjoyed for what it is--a spontaneous rush of emotions, a delicious flow of sensations. Most importantly, it is a comfortable experience.

The more people worry about their performance the more it will become a self-defeating sexual prophecy.

Seeking Help For Performance Anxiety

It is important for a person to seek help if performance anxiety is a major issue in their life. Anxiety disorders left untreated have a way of inviting more anxiety disorders which creates even more misery. Not treating the problem can also create additional sexual dysfunctions including erectile dysfunction as well as loss of erection.

A sex therapist teaches a person with performance anxiety how to cope with the problem and ways to overcome the unnatural fear of something that's ultimately fun, healthy and beneficial. A sex therapist can teach a person how to take occasional disappointments in stride and not become overly upset by an isolated incident.

If a person avoids seeking treatment the problem will escalate. What's worse--that you have sex, occasionally fail and learn from your mistakes, or that you become so afraid that you never attempt to conquer your fears and withdraw from sex?

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tova@sextherapylosangeles.com