Sexual Inhibition

What is sexual inhibition? Is sexual inhibition a dysfunction or a personal preference? Sexual inhibition refers to a conservative attitude, perhaps even a reservation towards sexual practices. This may include a general aversion to all forms of sex or certain sexual behaviors, such as oral or anal sex. Sexual inhibition is difficult to "diagnose" as all people are different, and come from very different backgrounds and cultures. Just because one person is unwilling to discuss sexual issues in the presence of others doesn't necessarily mean he or she is prudish; perhaps that person desires a certain level of privacy in sexual matters. On the other hand, there are some men and women who are inhibited to the point of sexual aversion--where they dislike all forms of sexual activity or are even afraid of intimacy.

What Is Sex To You?

Sexual inhibition needs to be viewed in the context of one's personal lifestyle. A person be said to have high sexual inhibitions because they are repelled by certain sexual practices, or are opposed to having multiple partners, or even sex before marriage. The status of having low sexual inhibitions has also been used to define people who are more open to try new erotic techniques. Ironically, men with low sexual inhibitions are considered "studly" whereas someone with high sexual inhibitions may be insultingly labeled as frigid.

The truth of the matter is that everyone has their own level of sexual comfort that should not be judged by others. People should be free to make up their own minds as to what is erotic and what is a turn off. Only you can determine the nature of your sexuality...is a part of your personality, and your decision alone. The problem starts when people become afraid of sexuality, and either avoid sex or avoid dating, even though they secretly desire intimacy and sexual fulfillment.

What Causes Sexual Inhibition?

A high level of sexual inhibition is traced to a person's psychological make up, and usually involves the repression of sexual behavior as a child. Additionally, expectations of society, as well as sexual myths and ignorance contribute to inhibition. Last but not least, relationship problems can cause sexual inhibition, since many lovers require a great deal of mutual trust before they can enjoy sex and reach new peaks of excitement.

Repression is a primary causes of this condition since many children are taught to avoid touching their sexual organs at a very young age. They are not taught much about sexuality besides the usual birds and the bees speech, and may grow up fearing sex. Confusion can cause inhibition since children often receive mixed messages about sex from all different directions: from their parents, from society (or religion), and from the media.

How Sex Therapy Can Help

The more severe a person's sexual inhibition (or fear) the more apparent it will become. Single individuals suffering from this type of major sexual inhibition may withdraw socially, fearing interaction with the opposite sex. Married men may experience erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation, and women may have problems with dyspareunia or vaginismus. The right time to seek sex therapy is as soon as you perceive that there is a problem. If sexual inhibition is preventing you from pursuing the sex life you desire, then it may be time to talk to a sex therapist. A sex therapist can help you with your body image, with understanding the act of sex as well as your personal sexual style.

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tova@sextherapylosangeles.com